Evermore Rewrite

Here I rewrote Evermore from the Beauty and the Beast live action movie. Originally written by Alan Menken and Tim Rice and performed on the movie by Dan Stevens.

This was inspired by the ups and downs of dealing with anxiety and the dilemma of getting help.

Some days I feel I have it all
Like I’m the master of my fate
And that maybe this thing will soon be gone
I learned the truth too late
I’ll never shake away the pain
I close my eyes and it’s still there
Nothing can heal this melancholy heart
It’s more than I can bear

Now I know this’ll never leave me
Even if I run away
It will still torment me
Tease me, hurt me
Move me come what may
Wasting in my lonely bedroom
Waiting for someone to care
I’ll fool myself and think I’m fine
But this’ll be here for evermore

I rage against the trials of love
I curse the passing of the time
Help seems to fly so far beyond my reach
It’s never out of sight

But I know this’ll never leave me
But help never fades from view
Can anyone inspire me
Be a part of anything I do?
To stop wasting alone in my room
And wait by an open door
I’ll fool myself I’ll think it’s gone
And as the long long day begins
With help I wonder what I will be
Do I wait here for evermore?

She Used to Be Mine Rewrite

This is the first song I ever wrote to deal with my anxiety. This is based off She Used to be mine from the Broadway Musical Waitress. Originally written by Sara Barielles and performed in the Original Broadway Cast by Jessie Mueller and other since then.

Here’s a video of the original if you want to listen to it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4KeSzeGikNc

This was inspired by how much I’ve changed because of my anxiety. Some days I really don’t recognize what I have become because of it.

It’s not simple to say
That most days I don’t recognize me
That these thoughts and this aching
This place and the faking
Has taken more than it’s given
It’s not easy to know
I’m not anything like I used to be although it’s true
I was never attention’s sweet centre
I still remember that boy

He’s imperfect but he tries
He is good but he lies
He is hard on himself
He is broken and won’t ask for help
He is messy but he’s kind
He is lonely most of the time
He is all of this messed up and shamed at what he’s become
He is gone but he used to be mine

It’s not what I asked for
This illness- it slipped in through a back door
And carves out some fears and makes me believe they’re all true
And now everything I rue
This disease I didn’t ask for
If I’m honest I know I would give it all back
For a chance to start over and rewrite an ending or two
For the boy that I knew

Who is timid just enough
Who gets hurt and needs to learn how to toughen up
When he is bruised and gets used by an illness that’s tough
And then he’ll get stuck
And scared of the life planned out for him
Growing scarier each day til it finally reminds him
To fight just a little and bring back the fire in his eyes
That’s been gone but used to be mine

He’s hurting he says he’s fine
He is lonely most of the time
He is all of this messed and and shamed at what he’s become
He is gone but used to be mine