Saving Amy Rewrite

TW: Suicide

This is a rewrite of Saving Amy by Brantley Gilbert. Anxiety can sometimes get you to be so down about your problems that it can lead you to these thoughts. While I’m not actively suicidal that doesn’t stop some of these thoughts from still coming when things are really dark. This rewrite is based on some of the darkest thoughts anxiety can give you. As the Trigger Warning states this is a dark rewrite and could be potentially triggering to some people.

If you would like to listen a long here is a link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WP1fWHHU2ZU

Would they find the letters I wrote
And keep my picture in a frame
After a year they might let go
And life would be the same
If I just did it one night if I just let go
And ended things forever in hopes of going home
If I never made it home one night
Would a part of someone die too?
They need not go lose their mind
It’s not worth it this is true
No one would need to go crazy and scream out my name
And would anyone come save me
To get through this I’d do anything

To get the tears out off my face
And realize everything’s okay
Feel my heartbeat going fine
And not lose all my time
Oh but God please help
You know I can’t keep living this way
Is it too late for saving me?
If there’s still hope please come and get me

When three years go by
And they’re living life
Would they remember me sometimes?
I’m sure they’d be alright
Without me being there
They were in my heart and my dreams
I thought of them forever when I did it I miss them but will they miss me?

And now the tears fall from my face
As nothing ever feels okay
I feel my heart pick up the pace
How fast this time goes
But oh God you know I can’t
I can’t keep living this way
If there’s still hope for saving me
Please come now and rescue me

God, kiss the tears off of my face
One day walk me through your gates
Calm my heartbeat in good time
Show me that I can be fine
God I thank you for everyday
Restore my every ounce of faith
And come back now and rescue me

I wish somebody would save me
me, save me
I wish somebody would save me
Come and save me
I wish somebody would save me
Come and save me x3
Save me
I wish somebody would come save me

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Falling Slowly Rewrite

Even when things are okay and I’m actually happy this illness still lingers on in the background. And that’s what this next rewrite is about. If you want to listen a long you can do so here. https://youtu.be/4LGavEmg6Xs

You don’t notice; I want you to
All the more for that
Words come easy I even fool me
Yet I can’t relax
And words that never amount
To more than they’re meant
Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We’ve still got time
Raise your hopeful voice, show I have a choice
And I’ll make it out

Falling slowly eyes that know me
And I can’t go back
Moods that take me and erase me
Even when things are on track
I have suffered enough
And warred with myself
How will I know I won?

Take this sinking boat and point it home
Even when I seem fine
Raise your hopeful voice I have a choice
To make it out

Falling slowly, but I can stop me
I’ll sing along

I’ll be fine

I played my cards too late

All’s not gone

All Too Well Rewrite

——–Content Warning——-
This song was not written in a positive light and is quite depressive. It would be best not to be read if your mind is not in a good place

Trigger Warning: Suicide
——————————

This is a rewrite of All Too Well by Taylor Swift. The sound of this song really captures some of my feelings so I also changed the lyrics to do so. Once you’vehad a mental illness you remember it all too well and when certain feelings return you know them all too well. That’s what this song is about and what the repitition of all too well touches on.

I woke up this morning and my mind was cold
But something bout it felt like home somehow and I
Kinda got used to this mindset all freaked out
I had some good weeks but upset again now
Oh my calm disposition
And my wide eyed gaze
I’m crying in my car feeling lost
All day
The autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place
I hope this season is better than my last days

Happiness long gone and my
Magic’s not here no more
I might feel okay but I’m not fine at all

Cause there I am again anxious walking down the street
Thinking there’s nothing good here left for me
Why should I care if I’m there I remember things all too well

Photos of the past
My cheeks were turning red
I used to be a little kid with glasses in a twin sized bed
And my mother told stories and I’d watch the ball game
Now Im thinking about my past thinking where is my future

Feels like it’s long gone and there is nothing else I can do
I forget why I’m staying strong enough and forget why I need to

Cause here I am again in the middle of the night
My brain waking up and engaging me in a fight
Do I care? I am here. I remember it all too well, yeah

Maybe I got lost in translation
Maybe I didn’t try enough
But I don’t feel like a masterpiece
I’ve been torn all up
Running scared do I care? I remember things all too well
Anxiety comes up again and breaks me like a promise
So casually cruel what’s the point in being honest
I’m a crumpled piece of paper lying here
Cause no one remembers all too well

Time will fly and I’m paralyzed by it
I’d like to be my old self again
But I’m still trying to find it
After stressed out days and nights when
I was on my own
People suffer from this why do I walk alone?
Feels like I’m back in that very first week
When I was first anxious and felt up the creek
You can’t get rid of this and I
Remember it all too well

Because here we are again and I
Have another
Seems like this illness is the one real thing I’ve ever known
Do you care? If I’m not there? I know it all too well

Do they care? I’m aware I remember it all
Down the stairs I am there I remember it all
It’s not rare do I care I remember it all too well

Still Hurting Rewrite

This is a rewrite of Still Hurting from the musical The Last Five Years. Save Myself is still coming but this summarises how I sometimes feel still really well.

If you would like to listen to it here is a link. https://youtu.be/6zmmH_8ha28

When is this over when is it gone?
When will anxiety decide to move on?
There are my dreams how can I build upon
When I’m still hurting

I feel like I’m at the end of the line
What do I do with these problems of mine?
How long until I feel just fine?
And I’m still hurting

Should I lie about anxiety?
What about things
That I really want to do?
What happens now to me?
What about me?

It feels like something wonderful died
Where is my old life getting it back I’ve tried
Not many people I’ve tried to confide
And I’m still hurting

Go and hide and run away
Run away is there anything better?
Go and store my problems away
And pretend like it’s simple
Like I’m alright

Give me a day now to
Be better and try
Recover from my falls
Maybe I’ll see
How they could be
So certain that I
Will one day stand tall

Anxiety’s not over where can I turn?
Covered with scars I did nothing to earn
Maybe there’s somewhere a lesson to learn
But that wouldn’t change the fact
I can learn from the past
And fix my foundations cracks
But I’m Still Hurting

Happier Rewrite

This is a rewrite of Happier by Ed Sheeran. This was inspired mostly by the depressive feelings that can come with anxiety and wanting to be “Happier.” Also watch for a song tomorrow that will almost be a sequel to this. It’s another Ed Sheeran song.

Working at the store tonight
Another attack I need to fight
Been a month since I had one
I’ve been happier
Want to walk it off again now
Please say something to make me laugh
A long time between smiles I sometimes go
I wish I was happier I do

Ain’t nobody hurt me like I hurt me
I need someone to love me now I do
People forget I dont make it personal now I
I’m trying to move on and start new

Cause I wish I was happier I do
I go numb and I can’t feel it too
And until then I’ll smile to hide the truth
I used to be happier it’s true

Sit in the corner of a room
Because I’m panicking can’t move
Nursing a hurting mind now and telling myself
I could be happier why aren’t you?

Oh ain’t nobody hurt me like I hurt me
And I’m lost don’t know what to do
I know that there’s others and this they’ve gone through
But it doesn’t feel like I can do it too

Will I ever be happier me too?
My friends say one day it will be true
For now I smile to hide the truth
I guess I could be happier it’s true

Maybe I could be happier it’s true
I know I might fall for someone too
But for now I need to find the truth
And know I can be okay on my own it’s true

Demons Rewrite

—–Content Warning—–
While not as dark as some of my other songs it would still be best if this is not read if you are in a negative place in your head.
——————————

This is a rewrite of Demons by Imagine Dragons. This song is about how much you hold in because of mental illness and how a lot of people don’t really know what’s going on in your head.

My mind’s gone cold and I just fold
And it seems my life is made of fool’s gold
When your dreams all fail behind everyone you trail
And worst of all your air has gone stale

I want to hide the truth don’t want to tell you
Bout my beast inside there’s nowhere I can hide
Sometimes I think I’m freed only to see I’m treed
Is this all for me? Is this all for me?

When I’m feeling beat look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide it’s where my demons hide
Don’t get too close it’s dark inside
It’s where my demons hide it’s where my demons hide

The curtain call my facade falls
When the light fades out my illness crawls
Should I give up faking and this masquerade?
Will they call me out at the mess I am?

I don’t want to let you down but I am so sick
Though I don’t want to tell you, I can’t hide the truth
Sometimes I think I’m freed only to see I’m treed
Is this all for me? Is this all for me?

When I’m feeling beat look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide it’s where my demons hide
Don’t get too close it’s dark inside
It’s where my demons hide it’s where my demons hide

Some people think it’s fake but this illness just takes
It’s woven in my soul can’t seem to let it go
My eyes are no longer bright, couldn’t save this light
Can I escape this now? Can someone show me how?

When I’m feeling beat look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide it’s where my demons hide
Don’t get too close it’s dark inside
It’s where my demons hide it’s where my demons hide

I Miss the Mountains Rewrite

This is a rewrite of I Miss the Mountains from the Broadway Musical Next to Normal. This musical is all about mental health so I had to rewrite a song for this blog. This rewrite describes the ups and downs of going through a mental illness. The original song is sung by a lady who is bipolar. However I have modified it to explain my experience with anxiety and my own mental illness. Please share it if you enjoyed.

Here’s the original if you would like to hear it https://youtu.be/Rt09n4O-OrE

There was a time when I flew higher
Was a time that mountians gave me peace, I could see
Now I see me, scared and broken
Now it seems that they have changed I’m scared
I’m nowhere

All these sad and anxious months
Seems they’ve sapped up all my strenghth
I’m no longer free or fast
Feels my happy days are past

But I miss my mountains
I miss the peaceful heights
All the fun and happy days
And the peaceful quiet nights
What are these mountains?
I hate the new highs and lows
All the climbing all the falling
All the rest I had is now gone
I’m being stung with snow
And being soaked with rain
I liked the peace
I hate this pain

Mountains make me crazy
They were safe and sound
My mind is somewhere hazy
My feet aren’t on the ground
I was in the mountains there And on an even keel
Everything was perfect
Nothing’s real
Nothing’s real

And I miss my mountains
I miss my safe climb
Mountains are now very unsafe
I liked spending all my time
Where the air is clear and comforts your life
I miss my mountains
I miss my mountains
I miss my life
I miss my life